I keep telling myself, "It's just a phase...for all of us."
Well, not such a bright and cheerful "Everything's goin' great!" entry today.
(off the subject, I've been thinking the blogging was an act of therapy that was helping more than I thought it was, so I am going to make a more concerted effort to blog more often...but anyway...)
There have been inklings of this here and there over the last few weeks, but last night, my son started crying into his dinner at about 6:30...it started with him just looking sad, next thing you know it was "I want to go to Mommy's, I want to sleep in my train bed, I want to go to (EL's town name, we'll call it EL-town...) ELtown to sleep tonight!"
Oh boy.
He just wouldn't calm down. For about an hour, on and off, he was crying. Said he wanted to talk to Mommy. Well, EL and I do have an agreement and I actually do my best to hold my end up, so even though I did not think it was a Good Thing, I called her - not home though. Try explaining that to a distraught 2 year old...
Well, long and short of it, he was very upset and kept saying he wanted to be with Mommy. I'd say, "Don't you like being at Daddy's" and of course he'd say yes, but didn't matter, he'd go right back to asking for Mommy's house, etc.
Now, I'm not stupid or naive and so I "take this" on two levels - one, the analytical, observant person who understands some of these dynamics now, looks at it as just a phase that he's going through, and it's nothing personal, and he's 2 (almost 3) years old and can hardly articulate these complex thoughts and feelings he's having, and he's in the middle of a terrible time and we all have to do our best to help him through it, and he'll be OK, and I'll be OK...
And on the other of course, it's hurting me like a motherfucker for two reasons, mainly... #1, I have to say "no" to him that he has to be at Daddy's tonight, because that's the right thing for many reasons, and #2 of course because he's crying for Mommy but he never cries for Daddy when he's with her. (I don't know that, she says he doesn't, and I actually choose to believe that...)
I tell myself all the right things - he's hurting, he's naturally bonded more with Mommy anyway, it's a phase some kids go through even in married happy families, he'll be OK, he forgets about it all once I distract him with something fun and interesting, etc.etc.etc.... but it still sucks.
Now, the EL part of this is, that I do not feel she is helping the situation. On the one hand, I know when I'm around the two of them she's big on saying things like, "You'll have fun with Daddy, and Mommy will see you Wednesday" or wahtever. "You like being at Daddy's house, it's fun, you guys can play" and stuff. I don't really know what she says/does behind my back with him, of course, but I would HOPE she doesn't say anything negative. (more on this in a moment, though.) Yes, because it's in our agreement not to and I could get her in "legal trouble" (theoretically, but good luck proving something liek that, right?) but also because it's the right thing and I actually give her enough credit to think she isn't KNOWINGLY, purposely, trying to make him "love mommy/not want to be with Daddy."
BUT....she's undermining things in her own immature actions. My "nights" are Monday and Tuesday, so those two days I go pick him up at her parent's house (they watch him during the day, and yes, I'm starting to wonder if that's a good idea...) at about 5:30-6pm. For the last few weeks, SHE is ALWAYS THERE when I do. She apparently runs up there after work and gets there about 20 minutes before me, and plays with him and stuff like that.
I'm not thrilled with that, but I don't know that I could really stop it even if I were inclined to. I told her I think it's wrong and I wish she wouldn't, her reply is (getting all angry) "I call him everyday, and I tell him if he wants to see me I'll come visit, and he always does, and I will not say no to my son! I will never deny him if he wants to see me I will be there!" Legalities aside, I ask you - is that realistic? IS that really "good parenting" to never deny your son anything? I don't think so. Yes, I'm baised, but come on....you have to say no sometimes, don't you?
That aside, it's clearly not "fair" to me and The Boy's relationship. Because of course, what this means is when I get there at 5:30, no matter what she SAYS, it LOOKS like "Daddy is taking you away from Mommy now." Right?
Right.
There's more...she makes a big to-do over him and says how much she'll miss him and everything while I'm putting him in the car, etc.
I aksed her nicely last night when this all came to a head in a phone call argument, "Would you at least please make sure to leave before I get there, to avoid that appearance?" She refused, again by saying, "The Boy always asks me to stay and not leave until you get there."
Listen, reading this back this sounds heartless, like I'm saying she has to deny him things and say "no" to him and refuse to spend time with him on my days. Tjhat's not my point, really. Occasionally, it's fine...but this refusal to even imagine saying "no" to him is NOT doing HIM any favors! If she truly wants what's right for him, shouldn't she realize this behavior is hurting and confusing him more?
Yes, I could "retaliate" by starting to show up there myself on "her days" - and if I did, she's really fucked because I have a very flexible schedule at work, it would be damned easy for me to leave every day at 4, spend some time at his Pappy's house with him until she gets there, reverse this situation, and then go back to work to make up the time. I could also - adn this I might start doing - leave work early on Monday/Tuesday to pick him up before she gets there and make up the time later int he week. I may have to start doing that.
But I'm digressing - I don't WANT to "retaliate" because that's not going to help The Boy OR the two of us deal with this.
I think - and this isn't purely an original though, RHA has speculated thusly - that the real problem is that SHE can't bear to be away from him, SHE needs to be with someone who loves and needs her unconditionally, and that's why she keeps playing this "he needs his Mommy more than his Daddy" card at me.
Did I blog in here last week when she had me all pissed off that she essentially (not that she'd see it this way) tried to "bribe" or "buy me off" of my son? She did. She said if I'd give her more time with him, she'd "cut me a break" on the child support. Yep, that's right!
She tried to say, in fact, "I think you should have him during the day at your house on your weekends, but he should sleep at mine." She doesn't see how stuff like that would make it worse, not better....
But anyway, yeah, she tried to claim if I would do that, she's ask for less child support. Which is ass-backwards, anyway!
Needless to say I refused. I love my son and I have to do everything I can to build our relationship in spite of her actions and I won't budge on this.
The property agreement isn't signed yet, so I hate to antagonize her, but quite honestly if it came down to it and she flipped out and reneged on the whole agreement and decided to go after my stocks, my 401k, etc.etc.... I would still not back down. There's no amount of money I'd trade for less than 50% of the time with my son, and my stocks/401k are nothing to get excited about financially anyway... (Unless maybe Deutsche Telekom really DOES sell off T-Mobile USA, in which case my options might surge...heh)
So...anyway. This has me upset. I don't want to get all "lawyer" on her, but it happens I have a meeting on Monday with mine about the property stuff, so I will ask a few questions. I think I'm screwed to a point - as long as he's going to day care at his grandparents (her parents) I'm sure I don't have a leg to stand on demanding that she not be there.
I'm too broke to put him in day care those days, though I'm just about upset enough to swallow my pride and ask my Dad and his wife if maybe they'd be willing to pay for 2 days of day care a week so on Monday/Tuesday I could drop him off at the daycare center that's 1 block away from my office....
She said some pretty annoying stuff last night, but I did my best to refuse to argue or get angry....which of course really got her pissed off and to the point where she eventually hung up on me. I don't even get phased by that anymore - never did really, but definitely not now. But anyway, she got under my skin with one comment: "Maybe you need to spend more time with him when you're with him." I was like, "Did you hear waht you just said?" She replied, "You knwo what I mean, you should be playing with him instead of fucking around on your computer..." Now, she hasn't lived here for 6 months, what the hell is she talking about?
I think my blog audience can attest to the fact I hardly use the computer at all anymore, and not when he's here that's for sure. But yeah, that one pissed me off - because it shows what she THINKS goes on here and therefore I think shows what in her little mind is the problem - she thinks the reason he wants to be with Mommy all the time isn't because of the crap SHE'S doing to spoil him and undermine me, but because he and I don't have fun or play or something.
Whatever....she's completely wrong ofcourse, but I won't deny that pissed me off. I felt like saying, "What about all the time you spend in chatrooms when he's at your house and it's before 8pm, who's he playing with then?" But yeah, I'm not gonna sink to her level....she also said he said Daddy doesn't read to him anymore which is silly - RHA and I had read him 2 stories that very night before he fell asleep in fact. And as I think I blogged before, after reading a story or two at bedtime, then I tell him a story based on what he wants to hear about (last night he wanted a story about a biplane and the control tower at the airport...) AND then he tells ME a story. (Which usually sounds a lot like the one I told, or else a lot like what he and I did that day, but still, it's a story he's telling from his own imagination...)
OK I'm getting defensive here and laundry-listing all the good things we do together....I guess to make myself remember that she's full of shit and has no clue what's going on here. None.
I just wish she'd wise up and realize that this over-smothering him with Mommy all the time isn't going to help the situation.
I'd much rather her back off on "my days" than the opposite, which is for me to start over-smothering him myself on "her days." That is a stupid war and one I probably can't win and would hurt my son to no end to get involved in.
Oh, and one last thing....last night as he was bawling and saying things it was hard to make out, I think he said something like "Daddy's house sucks." I said, "What about Daddy's house?" HE said it again, clearer - "Daddy's house sucks." I said, "Who says that?" and his reply, of course, was "Mommy did. Mommy says Daddy's house sucks."
Now, I ask you, would a not-quite-3 year old be able to come up with that on his own, while in a highly emotional state? I don't think so. I'm not saying she actually said that to HIM, maybe she just said it while he was in the room to someone, I don't know....but I'm not happy.
She denied it of course, completely. But I'm sure he's not making that up.
Oh, he also said in a very odd way, when I puicked him up yesterday as she was putting him in the car, "I'm going to ask Daddy if I can go home with Mommy." But he never actually ASKED me, he just kept saying that to HER. My gut feeling is that she coached him to say that, like, "If you want to come with Mommy, you'll have to ask Daddy yourself if you can come home, you can ask him when he gets here."
Maybe that's not fair and just in my mind. He IS very smart and articulate and I could see him coming up with that one purely on his own, in a contemplative state.
But "Mommy says Daddy's house sucks" when he's completely emotional and crying and all that -- no. That was pure EL that time.
Ugh.
(off the subject, I've been thinking the blogging was an act of therapy that was helping more than I thought it was, so I am going to make a more concerted effort to blog more often...but anyway...)
There have been inklings of this here and there over the last few weeks, but last night, my son started crying into his dinner at about 6:30...it started with him just looking sad, next thing you know it was "I want to go to Mommy's, I want to sleep in my train bed, I want to go to (EL's town name, we'll call it EL-town...) ELtown to sleep tonight!"
Oh boy.
He just wouldn't calm down. For about an hour, on and off, he was crying. Said he wanted to talk to Mommy. Well, EL and I do have an agreement and I actually do my best to hold my end up, so even though I did not think it was a Good Thing, I called her - not home though. Try explaining that to a distraught 2 year old...
Well, long and short of it, he was very upset and kept saying he wanted to be with Mommy. I'd say, "Don't you like being at Daddy's" and of course he'd say yes, but didn't matter, he'd go right back to asking for Mommy's house, etc.
Now, I'm not stupid or naive and so I "take this" on two levels - one, the analytical, observant person who understands some of these dynamics now, looks at it as just a phase that he's going through, and it's nothing personal, and he's 2 (almost 3) years old and can hardly articulate these complex thoughts and feelings he's having, and he's in the middle of a terrible time and we all have to do our best to help him through it, and he'll be OK, and I'll be OK...
And on the other of course, it's hurting me like a motherfucker for two reasons, mainly... #1, I have to say "no" to him that he has to be at Daddy's tonight, because that's the right thing for many reasons, and #2 of course because he's crying for Mommy but he never cries for Daddy when he's with her. (I don't know that, she says he doesn't, and I actually choose to believe that...)
I tell myself all the right things - he's hurting, he's naturally bonded more with Mommy anyway, it's a phase some kids go through even in married happy families, he'll be OK, he forgets about it all once I distract him with something fun and interesting, etc.etc.etc.... but it still sucks.
Now, the EL part of this is, that I do not feel she is helping the situation. On the one hand, I know when I'm around the two of them she's big on saying things like, "You'll have fun with Daddy, and Mommy will see you Wednesday" or wahtever. "You like being at Daddy's house, it's fun, you guys can play" and stuff. I don't really know what she says/does behind my back with him, of course, but I would HOPE she doesn't say anything negative. (more on this in a moment, though.) Yes, because it's in our agreement not to and I could get her in "legal trouble" (theoretically, but good luck proving something liek that, right?) but also because it's the right thing and I actually give her enough credit to think she isn't KNOWINGLY, purposely, trying to make him "love mommy/not want to be with Daddy."
BUT....she's undermining things in her own immature actions. My "nights" are Monday and Tuesday, so those two days I go pick him up at her parent's house (they watch him during the day, and yes, I'm starting to wonder if that's a good idea...) at about 5:30-6pm. For the last few weeks, SHE is ALWAYS THERE when I do. She apparently runs up there after work and gets there about 20 minutes before me, and plays with him and stuff like that.
I'm not thrilled with that, but I don't know that I could really stop it even if I were inclined to. I told her I think it's wrong and I wish she wouldn't, her reply is (getting all angry) "I call him everyday, and I tell him if he wants to see me I'll come visit, and he always does, and I will not say no to my son! I will never deny him if he wants to see me I will be there!" Legalities aside, I ask you - is that realistic? IS that really "good parenting" to never deny your son anything? I don't think so. Yes, I'm baised, but come on....you have to say no sometimes, don't you?
That aside, it's clearly not "fair" to me and The Boy's relationship. Because of course, what this means is when I get there at 5:30, no matter what she SAYS, it LOOKS like "Daddy is taking you away from Mommy now." Right?
Right.
There's more...she makes a big to-do over him and says how much she'll miss him and everything while I'm putting him in the car, etc.
I aksed her nicely last night when this all came to a head in a phone call argument, "Would you at least please make sure to leave before I get there, to avoid that appearance?" She refused, again by saying, "The Boy always asks me to stay and not leave until you get there."
Listen, reading this back this sounds heartless, like I'm saying she has to deny him things and say "no" to him and refuse to spend time with him on my days. Tjhat's not my point, really. Occasionally, it's fine...but this refusal to even imagine saying "no" to him is NOT doing HIM any favors! If she truly wants what's right for him, shouldn't she realize this behavior is hurting and confusing him more?
Yes, I could "retaliate" by starting to show up there myself on "her days" - and if I did, she's really fucked because I have a very flexible schedule at work, it would be damned easy for me to leave every day at 4, spend some time at his Pappy's house with him until she gets there, reverse this situation, and then go back to work to make up the time. I could also - adn this I might start doing - leave work early on Monday/Tuesday to pick him up before she gets there and make up the time later int he week. I may have to start doing that.
But I'm digressing - I don't WANT to "retaliate" because that's not going to help The Boy OR the two of us deal with this.
I think - and this isn't purely an original though, RHA has speculated thusly - that the real problem is that SHE can't bear to be away from him, SHE needs to be with someone who loves and needs her unconditionally, and that's why she keeps playing this "he needs his Mommy more than his Daddy" card at me.
Did I blog in here last week when she had me all pissed off that she essentially (not that she'd see it this way) tried to "bribe" or "buy me off" of my son? She did. She said if I'd give her more time with him, she'd "cut me a break" on the child support. Yep, that's right!
She tried to say, in fact, "I think you should have him during the day at your house on your weekends, but he should sleep at mine." She doesn't see how stuff like that would make it worse, not better....
But anyway, yeah, she tried to claim if I would do that, she's ask for less child support. Which is ass-backwards, anyway!
Needless to say I refused. I love my son and I have to do everything I can to build our relationship in spite of her actions and I won't budge on this.
The property agreement isn't signed yet, so I hate to antagonize her, but quite honestly if it came down to it and she flipped out and reneged on the whole agreement and decided to go after my stocks, my 401k, etc.etc.... I would still not back down. There's no amount of money I'd trade for less than 50% of the time with my son, and my stocks/401k are nothing to get excited about financially anyway... (Unless maybe Deutsche Telekom really DOES sell off T-Mobile USA, in which case my options might surge...heh)
So...anyway. This has me upset. I don't want to get all "lawyer" on her, but it happens I have a meeting on Monday with mine about the property stuff, so I will ask a few questions. I think I'm screwed to a point - as long as he's going to day care at his grandparents (her parents) I'm sure I don't have a leg to stand on demanding that she not be there.
I'm too broke to put him in day care those days, though I'm just about upset enough to swallow my pride and ask my Dad and his wife if maybe they'd be willing to pay for 2 days of day care a week so on Monday/Tuesday I could drop him off at the daycare center that's 1 block away from my office....
She said some pretty annoying stuff last night, but I did my best to refuse to argue or get angry....which of course really got her pissed off and to the point where she eventually hung up on me. I don't even get phased by that anymore - never did really, but definitely not now. But anyway, she got under my skin with one comment: "Maybe you need to spend more time with him when you're with him." I was like, "Did you hear waht you just said?" She replied, "You knwo what I mean, you should be playing with him instead of fucking around on your computer..." Now, she hasn't lived here for 6 months, what the hell is she talking about?
I think my blog audience can attest to the fact I hardly use the computer at all anymore, and not when he's here that's for sure. But yeah, that one pissed me off - because it shows what she THINKS goes on here and therefore I think shows what in her little mind is the problem - she thinks the reason he wants to be with Mommy all the time isn't because of the crap SHE'S doing to spoil him and undermine me, but because he and I don't have fun or play or something.
Whatever....she's completely wrong ofcourse, but I won't deny that pissed me off. I felt like saying, "What about all the time you spend in chatrooms when he's at your house and it's before 8pm, who's he playing with then?" But yeah, I'm not gonna sink to her level....she also said he said Daddy doesn't read to him anymore which is silly - RHA and I had read him 2 stories that very night before he fell asleep in fact. And as I think I blogged before, after reading a story or two at bedtime, then I tell him a story based on what he wants to hear about (last night he wanted a story about a biplane and the control tower at the airport...) AND then he tells ME a story. (Which usually sounds a lot like the one I told, or else a lot like what he and I did that day, but still, it's a story he's telling from his own imagination...)
OK I'm getting defensive here and laundry-listing all the good things we do together....I guess to make myself remember that she's full of shit and has no clue what's going on here. None.
I just wish she'd wise up and realize that this over-smothering him with Mommy all the time isn't going to help the situation.
I'd much rather her back off on "my days" than the opposite, which is for me to start over-smothering him myself on "her days." That is a stupid war and one I probably can't win and would hurt my son to no end to get involved in.
Oh, and one last thing....last night as he was bawling and saying things it was hard to make out, I think he said something like "Daddy's house sucks." I said, "What about Daddy's house?" HE said it again, clearer - "Daddy's house sucks." I said, "Who says that?" and his reply, of course, was "Mommy did. Mommy says Daddy's house sucks."
Now, I ask you, would a not-quite-3 year old be able to come up with that on his own, while in a highly emotional state? I don't think so. I'm not saying she actually said that to HIM, maybe she just said it while he was in the room to someone, I don't know....but I'm not happy.
She denied it of course, completely. But I'm sure he's not making that up.
Oh, he also said in a very odd way, when I puicked him up yesterday as she was putting him in the car, "I'm going to ask Daddy if I can go home with Mommy." But he never actually ASKED me, he just kept saying that to HER. My gut feeling is that she coached him to say that, like, "If you want to come with Mommy, you'll have to ask Daddy yourself if you can come home, you can ask him when he gets here."
Maybe that's not fair and just in my mind. He IS very smart and articulate and I could see him coming up with that one purely on his own, in a contemplative state.
But "Mommy says Daddy's house sucks" when he's completely emotional and crying and all that -- no. That was pure EL that time.
Ugh.
posted by Fensty at 9:35 AM
8 Comments:
Hi JD
Glad to see you are back but sorry to see the reasoning for it.
Without going into a long diatribe, I will just say two things. In my experience, this will get worse before it gets better. Likely, until she finds some happiness outside of the boy in her own life, she will continue to be over dependent on him and either consciously or subconsciously try to subvert your relationship. The worst thing that could happen (in her mind - whether she chooses to admit it or not) is that after she left you - you were the one who turned out happy. You kept your home, have a good relationship, and 50% of the time with your child - who loves you. Contrast this to her apartment, her chat rooms, etc... It sounds like the boy is just about the only good thing she has going - and that often results in peculiar behavior that is not necessarily in his best interest.
Also, one of the best tips we got from our custody evaluator, was to always drop the child off to the other parent. (Obviously, the day care situation presents difficulties not solved by this system but...) He said when it is time for the child to go to the other parents house he should be dropped off. (He also was EMPHATIC about how the parents must be positive about each other in front of the child, talk the other up so to speak, act excited about the transition for the child) He said it was important for it to appear as though you are giving the child instead of taking the child from the other parent. This implies trust, acknowledges that this is the right situation for the child. It also prevents one parent from picking up the child when he is participating in some fun activity with the other parent - which can make them not want to go, breed resentment, etc...
Honestly, this was not something we had ever thought of until he started discussing it - but it made sense. We started dropping off the next day as we had previously been picking the boy up from one another.
Good luck! Hope to see you around more often.
Meg
Like Judge Judy always says, you have to love your children more than you hate each other. I would go with family counseling before it gets too bad. In fact, I'm thinking about moving to another state and delaying my ability to file for divorce for at least another six months just so family counseling is mandatory.
I went through this quite a bit as well. I always had to pick up my boy at X2B's - previously the family house - whereas he got to pick him up from school. But in time there were fewer tears and a better transition. I gave in once when he cried to stay with X2B another day but heard from many sources that we should both be firm about scheduling and against manipulation, and we haven't been challenged like that again. The badmouthing happens from time to time too, as just last week the boy said to me, "you're not going to like this ... but Daddy called you an idiot." I handled it by having a discussion with him about how being called names hurts peoples' feelings and that I hoped he wouldn't call any of his friends an idiot or other names, but generally just let it slide with X2B since 1) I don't know the context of the remark, and 2) it wasn't important enough to risk X2B reprimanding the boy for telling on him (which he might do).
I went through a lot of pain in the beginning but things got better, and I know in my heart of hearts that nothing X2B can do will make my son stop loving his mother. I also know that as he gets older he will need his father more and me less. As it is, he drew us both pictures in camp this past week and wrote "I love you Daddy" on his and when I asked why he didn't write anything on mine, he said he didn't know how to spell "I like you." It hurts to hear those things, but I have to maintain perspective, because right now he identifies more with his father because "boys are cool" and they do a lot of great things together that they never really did before the separation.
I guess I just try to look 20 years down the line and if the decision I'm making now will have us close then or not. It's easier to maintain big picture perspective and not sweat the small stuff that way.
Whatever you do, don't hurt the child in any way for your own and EL's mistakes and emotional needs. I think it's great that she makes time to spend a few extra minutes with him before he goes from her parents to you. I don't see how parental attention can be bad for him in any way right now.
Of course I really should go back and read my parenting books for more authority on this one, including "Raising a Son" by Don & Jeanne Elium, and "In the Best Interest of the Child" by Stanton Samenow. I assume you have the same or similar resources to refer to.
Good luck.
I definately think if you can swing it so you can take your son to daycare on your days then do so. When the boys were small they went to preschool on their Dad's days (mainly because he couldn't count on their mother to watch them while he was at work) and when they are here he gets home as early as he can and then makes it up later in the week at work. And we could tell that the things they learned in preschool helped them out when they started kidnergarten.
I could offer you a lot of advice and personal stories here, but honsetly you will need to find your own way to deal with what is going on. Don't stress too much, it does get better eventually. Just let your son know that you love him, be good to him and see him as the gift that he is.
i am sorry you are having a hard time...divorce sucks. people are not always fair and or sane. now i want to comment on your ex wifes comment about how she will never say no to her son. is she retarded? if your son was smoking crack and asked his mother for money for more crack she would give it to him cuz she cant say no to him. great mom.
Divorce is ugly that's for sure. I've had my stbx throw alot of ugliness my way but I grin and bear it for my son, there is no sense in engaging in all of it, it will all come to an end soon er or later right? Its all about my child, thats what I keep telling myself.
One thing in your post struck me, how your stbx dotes on him when she is leaving and says I miss you, etc. That is one thing I will absolutely not do. Kids that age internalize a heck of alot and my 3 1/2 year old is worried about me being alone on his weekends with his dad so I won't say I'll miss you, I say go and have fun :-) Its not right to put that pressure on the little ones.
My stbx actually tells our son that I am working when he has him, I suppose it is easier to say that then deal with telling him straight up that this is what it is. I believe you should tell him the truth, I don't think my son should need a reason (like I'm working) to go visit with his father.
It sucks to be the bigger person all of the time but you gotta do it! Lots of luck!, anyway, didn't mean to babble on...
Are you sure your ex wife is not my b/f's ex? Your story sounds exactly the same. She has tried to defather him for a year and a half. Raked him over the coals in child support. Lied to the courts, lied to her lawyer, lies to his daughter. She commited fraud by ordering something on his credit without his knowledge. We won that battle but it was about 8 months. His daughter has serious issues. She never discaplines her. So when she is here we have to deal with her and she is 6. She will cry that she wants to be with Mommy if she doesnt get her way here. Backmouths, buy me this buy me that. its pathetic. I feel your pain. Hang in there. I believe in Karma. What goes around comes around and every bitch will get hers. Yes Iam a woman and I dont care. There are some real LOSER women out there.
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