Yes, boring... Sorry.

Oh, yes, indeed, the blog is boring anymore, eh?

I just haven't had time to update. Being back at work, being single Dad, and trying to keep my head above water on other things no longer leaves the luxury of time to ramble on about my angst...

So, those in the Northeast US (or Midwest, apparently?) know what I spent my weekend doing - clearing snow, snow, and more snow.

We "only" got a little over a foot, which is pretty unusual for us, but from what I'm hearing Boston and New York got like 2 feet. I cannot imagine living in a city and getting that much snow.

So, I was out twice yesterday and once just now with the little plow on the front of my lawn tractor/riding mower, plowing the snow off the driveway. Beats shovelin'


Latest on the wife situation: Nothing much. I don't miss her, and even more so as I continue to hear stupid stuff about her. Get this, we have a mutual friend that she doesn't know knows me, who she chats with a lot, who has been telling me she's asking all kinds of questions about why guys have affairs, why a guy would be married 8 months and have an affair, etc.etc. Guess she's getting a little antsy that the Other Guy doesn't seem too interested in breaking up his marriage. LOL. I didn't expect it to happen so soon, but it's damn funny. Oh, she's also told him that she wants "unlimited sex without marriage." Yeah, so, you can see why, call me a control freak or not, it's nice to get input like this from people - just reaffirms my attitude that now that she's gone, I must NEVER let her back. I know if she calls me up all apologetic I'll be weak, and I'll think of The Boy, and I'll consider taking her back. Can't let me do that, ok, people?

Of course the mutual friend COULD be playing ME for the sucker so I don't really put much creedence into any of it, nor do I really care. So maybe she's putting him up to asking me this stuff to see what I'd say, etc. Don't know, don't care, but it ain't happening.


See, I think maybe I've come to a realiziation......I was happy with my wife, and I think we could have stayed married forever and it would have been "nice." In no way do I think I "settled" nor do I think she "settled" for me, we really were a good couple and a good marriage. But, in just the brief time I've been dating a few people, I've come to realize there WAS a lot missing from our marriage, in terms of converstation, spending time together, mutual likes and dislikes, etc. I think I may very well find someone else in my life who will bring all the things to a relationship that EL did, and more...and I can be more to them than I was to EL. She does have a lot of "growing" to do, I see that now. So did I, and I did it, and she's right, I did change. I do NOT think I changed for the negative, though - I mean, other than being a little too absorbed in work, and myself, and taking my wife for granted. I will always acknowledge that that is what caused the crisis point in our marrage.

But, the other things about me that get perceived as "control freak" - wanting the house and home to look nice, wanting to be successful at work, wanting my son to grow up healthy, smart, and with good manners and good habits, etc....these are normal things for a guy who was a bit of a slacker and fuck-off to change about himself as he grows, gets married, starts a family.

I have met a VERY nice person this week, went out last night, after talking on the phone literally every night since last Sunday. I was initially uninterested, wary even - she is only 28 (I'm 35, remember) and I swore to myself I wasn't going to do THAT again - EL is about to turn 30 and a lot of the issues, especially in how she's dealing with all this, are clearly related to maturity.

But, RHA as I'll call her, is great. She may be 28, but she has a master's degree in social work, owns her own home, just went through a divorce with many simliarities to mine (both things he &I have in common, and things he & EL have in common) and is director of social work at a rehab facility in the area. So....a world of difference from EL. A bit amusing she's a social worker, but even SHE tells me I'm no control freak, and she should know not only professionally but personally, her ex was had OCD and many of the classic control behaviors. So, anyway, we had a nice first date and will see each other again this week, and so that's good. I still talk to some of the other dates/friends I've made recently, I don't think any of them are "going anywhere" - Punky is a very close friend now but firmly in that "friend" column. ER and I haven't been able to get together much lately, though we talk and there is friendly interest there. I met KM 2 weeks ago and we had a nice time, but she lives about an hour away which makes things complicated as far as that goes. And I STILL haven't met the friend I've been chatting with the longest, MH, but hopefully will do so SOMEDAY... :)

All in all, then, it's been a pretty long week. I continue to feel better about things, and I really hope that the instant "click" between me and RHA isn't just a case of first-date butterflies and/or a rebound thing, because of all the people I've met so far she seems to be someone that's very compatible in the long run, but of course my fear is that we might have "met too soon" for both of us. The cool thing is she's just like me, in that, she likes to talk about that kinda stuff over and over so I can pretty much just bring that up in a conversation after a few more dates and see what she thinks. :)

EL is bringing The Boy over now so I will have him the rest of today, tomorrow night, and I will ask for her Tuesday as well since she kept him an extra day due to this weather/storm stuff. We'll see.